The Toronto Blue Jays' Joe Carter celebrates his game-winning home run in Game 6 of the 1993 World Series.
Photo: Mark Duncan/Associated Press
A few quick questions:
Do you have a backyard?
Do you have food in the refrigerator?
And if yes to both 1 and 2:
Would you be interested in hosting home games for the Toronto Blue Jays this summer?
That’s pretty close to a real offer. Major League Baseball begins its no-fans, pandemic-shortened, 60-game season Thursday—and the Toronto Blue Jays do not have a home field to call their own.
Perhaps it could be your home.
Don’t say no right away. Just consider it. Think of how cool it would be to invite your friends.
Want to come over tonight and watch the Blue Jays game?
I don’t know if that’s such a smart idea right now, sitting in your house, watching a baseball game.
No. They’re playing the Red Sox in my backyard.
Whoa. OK. I’ll bring beer.
This crisis began last week in Canada, when our neighbor to the north put the kibosh on the Blue Jays hosting games in its Toronto SkyDome, which is now called the Rogers Centre, but who cares, it will always be the SkyDome to me, sorry, Rogers.
Canada didn’t want its Jays and bunch of U.S. baseball clubs traipsing back and forth over the border, because Canada has its you-know-what together on the coronavirus, and we here in the U.S. still don’t have our you-know-what together on the coronavirus.
It wasn’t a baseball thing, it was a public-health thing. Canada reported 505 new cases on July 22. The U.S. reported 68,377. Unless the Blue Jays want to play intersquads until 2021, they need to find a way to play all of their games in the U.S.
A general view of Rogers Centre during a Blue Jays intrasquad game.
Photo: john e. sokolowski/ReutersFor a minute, it looked like Pittsburgh would be the solution. The Jays and the Pirates would temporarily share a stadium, like the football Giants and the Jets. But then the state of Pennsylvania stepped in and said, basically: Yeah, no thanks. We’ve got enough cases around here already.
Also, even though it was Philly back then, not Pittsburgh, you think Pennsylvania has forgotten the Joe Carter Jays and 1993?
This puts the Blue Jays in a pickle. The club opens its season Friday on the road in Tampa, and doesn’t have its “home” opener until Wednesday, July 29.
But where is “home?”
There was speculation about the Jays playing in a city with a minor league ballpark—perhaps Buffalo, since it was not far from the border—but my Journal baseball colleague Jared Diamond says that players are cool to the idea of playing in a minor league park. It’s possible the Jays could wind up playing in their spring training facility in Dunedin, Fla., but have you been reading the headlines from Florida lately?
Now there’s talk of the Blue Jays just couch-surfing the entire two-month season on the road. They would be reclassified as the “home” team for their “home games” in other Major League cities, but they would never have a place to call, you know, theirs.
That idea sounds truly terrible, more soul-crushing than any option. I don’t care what kind of road warrior you are, you occasionally need a home-cooked meal and to not get dressed out of a bag. The Jays are presumably trying to win a World Series—not Marriott Lifetime Platinum Elite Status.
Like in every predicament, there’s an opportunity. Major League Baseball and the Jays need to think creatively. Surely they’d prefer to play in a Major League facility, with its spacious locker rooms, well-groomed field and other accouterments. It’s said they’ll look into another MLB park. Baltimore? New York?
Boring! In a deeply strange season, let’s get stranger.
Here’s to the Blue Jays and baseball doing something truly original—a move they’ll remember forever.
What about basing the Blue Jays in Cooperstown, N.Y., home to the Baseball Hall of Fame? Others have suggested the “Field of Dreams” diamond carved from a cornfield in Dyersville, Iowa—the Cardinals and White Sox will play a real game there in August.
Of course, with baseball sticking to regional play in 2020, it might not be great to have Toronto based in, you know, Iowa.
Which brings us to you. And your backyard.
We will listen to all offers, but it would really help if you’re on the East Coast. I would offer my own place, but we’re in New York City, with about 80 cubic feet of concrete. Unless the Blue Jays want to reinvent themselves as a Brooklyn stickball outfit—not the worst idea!—they’ll need to go to the ‘burbs.
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Do you have a yard? Are you OK with 18 people playing a baseball game back there a couple nights a week for the next two months? Do you need lights? Can you grill hot dogs? Can you play “Baby Elephant Walk” on the organ? What about ‘O Canada?’ I’m sure if you have a favorite Rush song, the Blue Jays will let you play it.
You need some space, but not a ton of space. Have you been to Fenway Park? It’s about as big as the trunk of a Buick sedan.
There are perks. I’m going to assume the Jays will let you throw out the first pitch at every game. You’re going to make friends with the players. You’re going to actually get to go to real-live Major League Baseball games, unlike every other baseball fan, who is going to be stuck watching this surreality on TV.
Any home run or foul ball, that baseball is yours.
Here’s the biggest perk: That grounds crew is going to make your lawn so nice. You’ve spent your entire adult life trying to trying to get a lawn to look like a ballpark. You’re going to be the envy of the entire town. Your neighbors will sit on their mowers and weep.
Yes, if the Blue Jays break a window, they’ll pay for it. Yes, they’re probably going to need to use the bathroom in the house from time to time, but don’t worry, we’ll make them take off their spikes. We don’t want them tracking mud over the living room carpet, I know it’s new.
Again, just think about it. Don’t rule it out. Talk it over with the family.
This has already been the weirdest summer ever. What’s wrong with making it a little weirder?
Share Your Thoughts
What “home” would you recommend for the Toronto Blue Jays in 2020? Join the discussion.
Write to Jason Gay at Jason.Gay@wsj.com
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